In dating love muyosan relationships

I Love Her No More

She wasn't my first love, but I knew her before then, from a distance. To be more specific, we only ever met twice in the course of 8 years; not much there. Well, you could say I knew her -  I just  hadn't found her. I found her years later.  At a time when many of the guys my age had gone so deep in their relationships

 But as they say, it's better late than never. I was a late bloomer, but love had never felt better. I was so into her. I defended her with passion, I spent hours talking about and spending time with her. We would go on dates every weekend, sometimes on week days. I absolutely adored her. 

She has so many brothers. I got quite close with some of them. Some of the happiest moments of my life was spent hanging out with them. I shared in their glory and their disgrace;their pleasure and their pain. They were like brothers to me. 

Then suddenly it started to fade; my feelings for her. I don't know if it was my work or something else, I just started to lose interest in her. I gradually cut off communications with her.

We would setup romantic dates and, for no cogent reasons, I would just forget to show up. At the start, I usually felt guilty about this. Then gradually my guilt reduced until I finally lost all feeling of it.

I look to other guys, the ones who started their relationships way  before me, I don't notice a slightest drop in their passion. In fact their passions seem to be getting stronger. Where did I get it wrong? Maybe i never loved her from the start. Were all those days of shared glory nothing but pretence? A desire to fit in with the other guys and not seem like the odd one? Was it all just a passing fad? It's not fair that this love was short-lived.

Dear football, I'm sorry I made you feel this way. I'm sorry I continue to miss all those Saturday afternoons I promised we would always spend together. Gradually, I found myself resorting to just highlights. From highlights I moved to settling for scorelines. From scorelines to timelines, till I eventually lost interest in everything that has to do with you.

I guess you always knew this from the start. Which is why you never opened yourself completely to me. I learnt to love and appreciate all you rules, feelings and aspirations. But I never fully appreciated your technicalities, no matter how hard I tried. All I had going for me was raw passion. It's all gone now sadly

As much as I don't wanna give up on you, I feel it's best we part ways. The last time we met - the day your Nigerian brothers visited with your Spanish brothers - it was by chance.
 I'll confess I did feel some of the old sparks and tingles but I'm guessing it's just the loneliness acting up.

I don't deserve you. Besides so many people all over the world already show you more love than I could ever conceive. These people who are more deserving of you. What difference could a little grain like me make in such a big ocean of sand? I wish you the best for the rest of your life and I promise to always watch out for you, only from a distance

Love Yours truly Take Care
Muyo-san

Muyo-san is one random Nigerian dude who also blogs at muyosan.com
Follow him on Twitter @MuyoSan

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4 sentiments:

  1. Muyo!!! You got me!!! You got me big time!! See me grinning and then squeezing my face. You this guy ehn, you are something else!! But I loved this! hee-heee

    ReplyDelete
  2. MUYO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dont you ever get me soo interested..omo..u certainly did me lol

    ReplyDelete

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