In early blog writings growth hurt journey pain recovery restoration

Yo-Ola Is

Hey HonesTea Lovers
Sorry, I've been soo... distant. I could give you a million and one excuses, but right now is it really necessary...?
Yes, yes it is. It's rude of me to be quiet for so long and then show up and ack like I just ran to the corner store to grab a pack of skittles. I just got busy with school, super busy, and then I lost Ron and I had to pull myself together. I also did a lot of soul searching! So trust I will have some interesting things to right about. 
Anywhooo, facebook has changed again and I ended up checking out different things and stumbled upon my very first blog posts. Pretty Neat?
farts and kisses
I was pretty upset this day and writing was my outlet. In fact, upset is an understatement. I was very much disturbed/depressed/an emotional storm the size of Sandy. Yet, I managed to contain myself and let my words express themselves.
Once I read it again, I thought to myself, dang Ola! Why would you post such, but I'm very happy that I did. I wrote this and a million other negative things didn't happen. Anywhoo, I'm off topic and talking too much. Here it is, "Bitter Sweet." I would name it that now, because I was of the worst kind of bitter then, but now God has made everything sweet. It's nice to look back and see the mountains you thought you'd never overcome are actually just anthills.
p.s. I wasn't truly happy, I'd say I was grateful considering the ordeal I had just passed through.
Temi Ye Mi
*I understand Myself*
Maybe much later in the future, I'll dish out full details on whoraheck was bothering me.
One day, my book will be published and you all can get the full scoop on my life.
Until then, here's a niblet of it...
*************************
March 3, 2008
Ola is...
Pissed, angry, irritated, hurt, having trouble forgetting, mindful, extremely observant, a thinker, fiery yet sweet, fighting, listening to Lauryn as tears fall, self-less because you want something as well as you and you and you, but what about me? So far there is no me...just gotta keep working, it'll be beneficial later.
A lady so of course she thinks about these notions, yet Ola is Ola so she suppresses them and labels them highly unnecessary.
Smiling while she ponders and questions deeply on the inside.
Vibrant, intelligent, quiet because she doesn't like you, feels sorry for you because if you get too close self-confidence and your ego will be dissolved. (ouch but at the same time hahaha. Don't mind me I was angry)
Kicking, screaming, fighting while tears stream down her face.
Truly out of the valley and climbing the mountain, but she just cant forget.
Contemplating, working hard, praying hard, bottled up inside, but is truly happy.
Simply expressing the right now, the temporary, she's definitely not always like this.
Praying for hers, you, and yours...
Mellow, dislikes judgement so don't look at her that way, busy, a Fighter, one who flees, free, confined, not confused, goal oriented, wonders why and why not.
Happy, colorful, full of laughter, imagining "the finest things," babbling, most random, pleased, unresolved, keeping it together, overly-confident, down to earth, learning forgiveness, grateful for loved ones in her life, happy they chose life.
Ola is indescribable.
Ola is complex.

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1 sentiments:

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    ReplyDelete

Be kind, Speak ya mind!!! As in any great cafe, your feedback is always appreciated!

:)
Ola