In Purple Ink Rehab

Tha Ugly

I literally googled "Oh Well" and this image came up.
I say, na this one be the perfect ting.
Thanks Buddy.

It's easy to sit behind this screen and write and talk about how I'm living celibate and the things I've successfully overcome with God. That's The Good.

Sometimes it's a little tough to discuss how I feel as if I'm the only one fighting for *insert Ola B's true life philosophy's here.* and how I feel soooo alone at times. Don't worry, you didn't miss anything, I just keep things well coded ;) Anyway sha, that's The Bad.
Buhhh now, as I sit here and write, I kind of chuckle because I'm so not interested in writing this post although I know what I'm going to say. I mean the topic is already selected, but see me tweeting, facebooking, pinging (bbm action that is for all you Americanas because you probably have upgraded to droids and iPhones but Ola B is still frustratedly pinging... msscchhheewwww), texting, and in a second I may even jump on skype.
So what's the issue?
This is The Ugly.
Celibacy. Celibacy. Celibacy.
Blah. Blah. Blah.
Be Good. Be Good. Be Good.
Bleh. Bleh. Bleh.
Some days, emphasis on days there, it gets really tough. 
Times come where I wonder if I'm kidding myself with all of this. Shoot I mean I got friends, family etc doing thangs their own way and they seem to be living the good life to me. Na mean? But dang it, I know where I'm coming from. Apart from being an undercover over-lover, I have struggles in my life just as much as the next person. It's the things that I have overcome that keep me from wilding out. I love partying, the latest of nights, the midnight hour gymnastics that keeps ya muscles burning for the next few days... yea. 
It's funny because I'm seen and understood as a good girl. I may even portray that or lead that on but at the end of the day, Ola is just Ola.
A great lady with awesome characteristic and a terrible vice.
I'll be honest, making it to the next #SingleLadyDay sometimes be's a struggle. But I'ma keep trying. 
Side Note: I bet this is how overly ambitious "church girls" get pregnant. They be struggling but keep fronting and then walk into church preggo and everybody be like Say Whaa?
Just because a babe is crazy about her Creator doesn't mean she does not have struggles. She's still human. 
They say, when a good girl has gone bad, she's gone forever. It's not true. Some of us get stuck in between and just hold onto our values while we push our vices away. We don't ignore them. We just pray that strength and growth over takes us. The aim isn't to be a "goody goody" so to speak, but to live life with peace and perform what we were created to be.
Lay hold of that which you were taken held of (that's my version Philippians 3:12)
That's the whole purpose of it all. Once you do take hold of it though, the struggles do not decrease. I'm even led to believe they increase because you do get better at fighting, but bigger things are thrown your way. I also think, well I'm very much hoping, that the point of it all is that through tough times we keep fighting. We keep believing and doing what's right even if it seems it has no rewards. Heck even if we fall, we get up and keep moving.

I think I'm finally getting it. Even though things aren't the way we would desire, we look past our own shortcomings, fears, doubts, and continue to rely on His truth.... Cuh everybody believes what's important to them is true. Time will allow Truth to reveal Itself to all.
And the future too. I think that's the most exciting part. When the future becomes the present. By then, such Ugly times as this will be revealed and fully understood.
I'll probably even laugh by then... if I keep pushing now that is.

Let me hit ya with a few quotes though:
Don't be to quick to declare an undesirable outcome a failure. Some victories have circuitous histories. - Anonymous. Not sure where this one originated from, but Nathan Bondo just posted it on facebook *shrugs*

"I've missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failing over and over and over again. And that is why i succeed." - Micheal Jordan

To live in a real world, is a very challenging play in our life. One must be very prepared that is strong enough to conquer fears and is always ready to overcome barriers in life.- Anonymous

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2 sentiments:

  1. Wow! Interesting piece, tho long, just wanted 2 know wat ur conclusion'll b. Ola, never ever give up on ur dreams n aspirations, especially d 1's dat r inline wit God's will 4 ur life. U'r alredi on d ryt track. Ade.

    1. Hey Ade!!! Thanks for the comment. My conclusion is and has been the same... keep doing my best at this purity walk, no matter how tough some days/nights get... And if I fall, I'll get up and start all over again.

      Clearly, you're a newbie. All of my posts are usually long >_< LOL it's a side effects of being talkative. You are welcomed sha! Do take time to look around and come again :)


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