In Rehab

Salt Tea

Yea lemme put myself on blast real quick....
My vacation at home has been filled with all kinds of unexpected events.
It's like I'm at home.... but I'm not at home.
The Ups, The Downs, The Twirling and changes of things has left me feeling like I'm in a whirlwind
or a washing machine.
Thank God I met everyone at home in peace and great health. There have just been soo many changes. 
To top it all off, due to my awkward schedule... I'm often by myself. 
Which leaves ample time for me to think and think and think and think and...
Too many thoughts running through my head at one time and I just flat out stress myself.
#NoBueno
So I started thinking, dang! I need to get out a bit more!
Where should I go? Who should I see?
That's when it kind of dawned on me,
"Umm Ola, you've visited mostly everyone already...."
and I'm talking thinking to myself like
wait, na unh! 
surriously...?
ohh my!!
Suddenly, I felt soooo alone. It was really bad. It was like someone pushed me down a flight of stairs and I found myself in a dusty basement of an old rejected abandoned building.... yea I can be dramatic, at times.
My self esteem and everythang just deflated with a quickness. Half the lessons I learned in this season of Kadesh just seemed to shrink away. I unexpectedly became the sad, low self esteem, dejected, detested Ola of last year. It all happened so fast. 
So I did what the old Ola was fond of doing... I threw a pity partay!
This time was a bit different. I smiled when others were around. Before, I'd just show my bad mood to everyone and people would just back off. And I invited my cousin-ish who is more like a sister to me. Boy did I text the babe at odd hours with all kinds of random saddness. smh thank God for loved ones...
But anyway sha, I just would cry and be like why must I cryyyy?!
I tried to pray, but I'm sure what I did was complain.
I also came up with a new plan of how to adjust to my solitude!
So day one of enforcement, something strange happened.
My phone rang.
yyyeaaa that does not usually happen
to make it sweeter it was my homie!!
She had been thinking about me two days ago and felt like she really needed to call me. She said Something just wasn't right. Welp....! LOL
Mehn, I opened up to her and we had a great convo!
I was starting to feel better already.
And then,
2 hours later, it rings again!
Another homie, actually it was two of them on the line!
mind you my phone has rang twice in one day! This is already a big deal
They said the same thing. They just had me on their mind and wanted to know if everything was okay!
Having those two conversations seemed like someone decided to rewind my life like a movie, up to the point where I'm supposed to fall down the flight of stairs and did some major re-writing and editing so I walk out the house and down the street to the ice cream shop. 
What..? I like ice cream.
That night too, I chatted it up bbm application style with a friend of mine. Random laughter at like 2am in the morning when we should have been asleep! Heck, she even motivated me to finally book a much needed getaway.
It doesn't even end there. I went to church the next day and Kemi straight called me out and asked if we were fighting! LOL I love her. 
p.s. If you don't know who Kemi is, let me introduce you.
When she said that, I thought, mehn this guh is good! How did she know something was up with me?
Apparently the babe had reached out to me but my phone or hers or both (who knows) was acting up.
At that point, I felt soo salty! To add extra salt with a BAM! like Emril does, the following day another friend calls me! This lady here is something else too! Within 30 seconds of our convo I'm already cracking up! She's like, "Gurrlll we surely did not finish our convo from two weeks ago and you surely ran out of church fast last night!" and we picked up right where we left off like a whole 17-something days did not pass in between!!
Mind you here I was, feeling alone in every sense of the word and God had already taken care of things for me. Yea times are a bit rough right now, but I do not have to go through it alone.
The situation reminded me of Lot's wife and a message Terri Savelle-Foy taught on it. 
She said something to the extent of because Lot's wife couldn't be hopeful about her future, she went back to her past and turned around. Right then and there she got stuck. She turned into a pillar of salt. Never being able to move forward again...
My saltiness was for a moment, but yall know salt don't feel good! LOL It felt like God actually treated me and was telling me to stop whining.
Things looked rough and instead of pushing forward and holding my head up, I went back, wayy back in time. Meanwhile, my friends were always thinking about me and one by one they showed I'm not alone. 
This week for many reasons will definitely go down as an unforgettable one.
Was I
Salt Tea Much???
Yea, no lie I was,
BUT I learned a valuable lesson.

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1 sentiments:

  1. I LOVE YOU LAIDE LOL!!!!! HONESTEA IS THE KEY!!! NOW BOOK OUR VACAY TOGETHER.

    ReplyDelete

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:)
Ola